The Journal
by astrophoebea
Summary: Draco Malfoy receives the oddest, literally out of their world gift from Narcissa Malfoy, a journal. Hermione Granger finds out about it. Read and see what happens! Dramione fic.
1. The Gift and the First Entry

**A/N: **It's been long since I have written a fanfic, and this is my first Dramione ff. Hope you enjoy reading it and reviews, good or bad, are welcome! :)

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Harry Potter characters. I only own the storyline.

**Chapter 1: The Gift and the First Entry**

"Never," a certain blond thoughT angrily to himself as he walked through the halls of Hogwarts. The mere thought of it makes him.. boil in rage. "Ok. That was an exaggeration," a thought he refused to admit to himself.

"Happy birthday, Draco," his mother greeted him. He opened the curious little package that was covered in green and silver – his favorite colors. Imagine his surprise when he held in his hand a black.. thing that had an inscription of his name in green and silver. He couldn't quite place what it is. His mother must have read his mind, or was his face just that obvious?

"It's a notebook, dear, a Muggle – "After hearing the word, he cut his mother off.

"Muggle? It's a _Muggle _thing?" He stressed the word so hard he was practically spitting the word out of his – pure blood – mouth. Narcissa shot him one of her "shut-it-dear-let-me-finish-you-know-how-I-dislike-being-interrupted" look and he shut up, but being Draco Malfoy, he mumbled words under his gritted teeth. The old, but delicate features of her face relaxed and as she began where she left off.

"It's a Muggle contraption they call, 'notebook,' it's where you write the events that happened to your day and.. feelings, whatever they may be." Now it was the blond Slytherin's face that changed, one far from relaxed. "Merlin's beard! Since when have you changed your mind about those dirty blooded.. and be involved in their world? And now you're, what? Basically shoving them into –"

"Stop being a heartless and insensitive git like your father!" This was the first time she decided to bring up the topic of his father up. Ever since he died, she hasn't talked about him, not that he wanted to, of course. He wasn't very depressed about the whole thing. After having , to put it bluntly, a not-so nice childhood, he just couldn't care less. After all, that's what his.. father taught him. "Be a man Draco," Lucius said after little Draco cried because he got hit by a spell he was practicing on blocking, "Never show emotions for they are a sign of weakness!" It was never a good memory and he seldom dwelled on it. He got caught up in his 'reminiscing' the hurt he felt from the past that he forgot his mother was still there.

"..now that he's gone, I'm changing your, our, ways, Draco. I didn't want you to grow up with hatred for your fellow wizards and witches because you're pure-blood. Lucius was.. not meant to be a father but a dictator. Yet I still can't forgive myself for not countering the way he raised you up." Her face was full of remorse, but not emotionally. Being married to Lucius Malfoy, Malfoy's in general, money wasn't a problem; therefore her child would be secure, financially speaking. But she knew the emotional consequences.

"Fine. Hypothetically, let's say that I accept.. them. But nothing changes the fact that, this is a bloody journal. I know about them due to a certain mudblood ranting and raving one day. It's girly." Draco said.

"Oh now you're being a gender hypocrite. Just give it a try, my son. This would help a lot."

"_Just give it a try." _His mother's voice echoed in his head. "Like that would bloody happen," he said a little too loud for one witch to overhear. Barely able to contain her curiosity for what is it that irked him, she nonchalantly walked towards the blond wizard, murmuring to himself, and collided with him, letting everything – including themselves – fall.

"Watch it, Granger!" he said and proceeded to pick up his things, not even bothering to help the bushy haired witch get up. Hermione expected this and before she could say anything, something black caught her eye. It had pages bound to it and on the cover it wrote _Draco Malfoy._

"Malfoy, is that a.. journal?" she stifled a laugh when she saw Draco turn different shades of red. Amazement and amusement danced around her eyes. "Merlin," this is just what he needed, to be taunted by the witch he hated the most. But he couldn't lie and say excuses because she already saw it.

"I don't see why I have to explain to you." He answered back and picked up the cause of the mishaps happening to him. But Hermione was not known for backing down.

"How hard is it to simply say 'yes' or 'no'? Too precious for your lips to let it slip huh?"

"You're not blind aren't you Granger? Or is your filthy blood also clouding your vision? And if I may add, I know you're dying to taste these lips of mine, but you know I hate your kind, so sorry.. oh wait. I'm not." And with that, he sidestepped her. He could feel daggers shooting at his back from Granger's stare, yet he couldn't careless. He knew bringing up the topic of blood status irked her. He didn't realize he made the biggest mistake.

"Well, atleast I'm not portraying a 'oh so high and mighty' reputation while carrying a journal around like a girl!" She shouted across the hall. He heard snickers behind him. That did it! He turned around to face her and attempted to hex her, Merlin, her would have used one of the three deathly curses. His bloody reputation was at stake! Just as he was about to hex her, someone shouted "Expelliarmus!" and disarmed him. It was Prof. McGonagal.

"Mr. Malfoy, I presume you know the rules, especially as Head Boy. You should set examples for the younger students. But since this was your first incident, I will let it go, but you will still meet me in detention later after classes.. and 20 points from Slytherin! Now off to class."

She helped Hermione who was so bloody scared a while ago and obliviated the memories of the students around the area. "Thank Merlin!" Draco thought. With one last look at Hermione, he went off to class. And so did she.

* * *

><p>After what seemed like an eternity, Potions class was over. Then he went to McGonagal for detention. He was asked to check the papers of the second years. After that, he headed to the Head's Dorm. Being Head Boy had its privileges and responsibilities. One disadvantage of course was sharing it with the Head Girl, none other than the Gryffindor Princess herself. He was annoyed at the thought of sharing the common room together; thank Merlin that they had two separate rooms.<p>

He said the password and the portrait opened. The fire in the common room was lit, meaning the mudblood witch was there. So far for his plans in lounging at the couch. He was too tired to talk and argue with her. So he headed to his room.

Hermione was curled up on the couch when she heard the portrait entrance open. She contemplated on whether to irk him some more and just as he decided that he had enough punishment, she heard his door close. "Oh well, waste of my time anyway."She said to herself. Indeed, she had a lot of homework's to do and she was only 3 lessons ahead of the class. A disgrace for her reputation as the brightest witch of her age.

* * *

><p>With nothing better to do, Draco decided to sleep early. He only had 2 homework's due tomorrow. He was confident he could answer it in his style – cramming. Being educated against his will when he was younger and living in a house that had a lot of books about all the different topics, he knew a lot, but would only wound up as 2nd in class rankings thanks to that know-it-all goody two shoe. He was about to fall asleep when a nagging feeling suddenly hit him. He knew he threw the journal away earlier, of course, taking out his name from the cover. He got out of bed, and lo and behold, the journal was there, lying on his desk, the silver and green lettering glistening in the moonlight.<p>

"Great," he mumbled. "Mother charmed the thing," annoyed at his realization. He was stuck with it. He knew that burning it wouldn't do even the slightest damage on the bloody thing. So he brought the journal and went back to his bed, and a letter fell from it.

"_Draco, dear,  
>I know you wouldn't like your gift, hence I charmed it, knowing you. You threw it away earlier didn't you? You can't burn it either. The purpose of this journal is to vent about what you feel. You've been alone for so long that I believe you don't know who to talk to. It was partially my fault. Tending to Lucius' more than you when you were younger. Now that he's gone, I want to make it up to you. After all those years, I know you have built a wall around yourself, isolating from other people, being sure that no emotion, except bitterness, hate, and disgust, were shown. But it doesn't have to be that way. Live, my son, and have a life. Say what you fee, better yet, write about it so you won't feel alone. Promise me you'll try. Send me an owl.<em>

_ I love you,  
>Mom"<em>

Sighing in defeat, Draco wrote a letter and owled it to her mom. He opened the journal and saw ivory colored pages. It was actually tempting to write and even if he won't admit it, he was starting to like the concept.

_June 5,_

_Hi. This is my first entry. My mother gave this to me as a birthday present. I read the letter and just accepted the fact. I will sleep now. Another bloody day of classes tomorrow._

_Draco M._

He placed the journal in his night table and went off to sleep.

**A/N:** So how was it? It's funny how Draco wrote on his journal. You could sense that he isn't letting his guard down yet, but that's the point of the journal; to gently let his emotions flow. Hope you liked it! Review please? :D As I said earlier, good or bad, I accept. :) Btw, can you send me some ideas for the password for the Head Dorm? Thanks! :)


	2. Potions Class and the Second Entry

**Chapter 2: Potions Class and the Second Entry**

A knock awakened Draco. "Get up, Malfoy. We'll be late for class," the voice outside his door shouted. Irritated for such disturbance, he threw a pillow to hit the door – his usual response meaning "Bloody hell let me sleep for Merlin's sake!"

Hermione was finished taking a bath. She got dressed, went down to the kitchen and made breakfast. Toast and omelet's it was. She ate alone as usual, not that she cared. After eating, she heard a ruckus behind her, Malfoy was in the middle of putting his upper clothes on leaving Hermione the liberty to gaze (yes gaze, stare was a strong word, after all) at that.. that.. toned chest and abs and for a moment she was thinking, "Malfoy doesn't look THAT bad at all." She shook off the thought, mentally reprimanding herself when a smooth voice broke her trance,

"Like what you see, Granger?" he smirked, laughing at her reaction which was not appropriate for her. She just dropped the matter all together by getting her bag, walking past him, and without looking back, went out through the portrait exit.

"She bloody liked it," Draco smugly thought to himself and ate his part of the breakfast.

* * *

><p>Hermione, on the other hand, was eager to forget the events this morning and she did it by distracting herself – participating in class, taking down notes, reading, and writing – which was her instant defense mechanism against such.. morbid thoughts.<p>

She thought that she forgot all about it when while eating lunch and was cheerfully chatting with Harry, Ron, and Ginny, the latter asked if she could talk to the awfully cheerful witch, "In private," she added and she stared at the two wizards who had no idea what was it for but decided it was some "girl thing" so they went away.

"What is wrong with you, Mione?" she asked.

"Oh Ginny, it's.. nothing..," careful not to let anything give away.

"You're stalling! I know you, Hermione Jean Granger, you can't hide anything from me. I'm your best friend!"

She was trapped. "Ok fine, Just.. ugh.. please keep it as a secret?"

"Of course!" was the cheerful response of Ginny. "I swear to it. Now what's wrong?"

"Please don't be repulsed by me.." Hermione pleaded.

"Just say it!" Ginny was getting impatient, she didn't really like to be kept in suspense.

Hermione sighed, "Well, earlier.. I was eating breakfast when Malfoy suddenly walked in through the kitchen.. shirtless.."

Silence.

"Well, he had his shirt on but he hasn't buttoned it and.."

Silence.

"He.. he.. has a nice body, for someone with that kind of attitude," remembering exactly what she was trying to forget, "Merlin's beard! Why am I bothered with this? I shouldn't be.."

She noticed the silence of her best friend, too silent for Ginny Weasly. She was just staring at Hermione like she did the worst crime ever.

"Why are you so quiet, Ginny? Why aren't you reacting? Oh I knew you'd be disgusted! I'm sorry I brought the topic up, I shouldn't have –"

"Blimey Hermione! I would die to see if the rumors were true! So, was it well-built like they say?"

Dumbstruck by Ginny's sudden fan-girling, she flustered at the thought again and just said, "Uh.. well, yes.."

"You're so lucky! I would trade anything to be in your shoes!" she caught her best friend eyeing her weirdly, and as Ginny realized what she just said, she added, "Please.. uhm.. don't mention this to anyone, especially Harry and Ron, you know how they are." She looked down, ashamed for what she did.

"Of course I won't," Hermione said with a wink. And after talking with her best friend, she proceeded to her last class.

* * *

><p>Malfoy was a tad to early for Potions class. Only Lavender Brown, Luna Lovegood, and Neville Longbottom were there. He couldn't careless, they left him alone in his corner anyway. That's the way it always was. But their chatter and laughter was infuriating, and just as he was about to shout at them, Hermione entered the room, looking distraught. He sat back in his seat and looked at her as she walked towards the chattering 3 musketeers.<p>

He suddenly remembered the remnants of that morning, catching Granger staring at him – his body, actually. He couldn't help but laugh at her reaction, but why did he seem pleased by her reaction? "Bloody mudblood messing with my mind," he thought.

The rest of the students ran to their seats just in time before Prof. Severus Snape entered the class with that dark aura lingering around him as always, he was after all, an expert in Dark Arts and the Defense Against the Dark Arts but was assigned as Hogwarts' Potions professor. It was utterly boring for him, and he didn't hesitate to show it, especially his dislike and favor for his students.

He caught Ron Weasly chatting with Harry Potter, and hit him hard on the head. Draco snorted so loud everyone heard him. The class looked at him, fellow Slytherins smiled at him and the Gryffindors, Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs stared at him in annoyance. Draco defensively said, "What? It was funny. Admit it." shrugging as he innocently asked, with the Weasel looking at him like he was going to murder him, "If looks could kill," the phrase suddenly made sense, remembering the bumping incident with Granger yesterday. Before he could finish his reminiscing, to his and the other students' surprise, including Weasley's and Potter's bewildered reaction to Granger's laugh that echoed the whole room. She was red in the face, laughing so hard tears were coming out of her eyes.

"What in the bloody hell are you laughing at Hermione?" Ron asked.

Granger was composing herself and said, "Ehem. I'm so sorry. It's just that.. the scene and your reactions are so funny reminding me of the sitcoms I watch in our television.. Hahahaha!"

Silence.

"What's a television?"

"And what are sitcoms?"

Everyone in the class asked, including the Slytherin's. Malfoy was thinking differently though, how he liked the sound of Granger's laughter, and how beautiful she actually –

"ENOUGH!" Prof. Snape bellowed. The class was quiet in an instant. "30 points from Gryffindor, including Ms. Granger's inappropriate laughter and reminiscing in my class. Now turn your books to page 238 and quit chatting."

"Amorentia.." Hermione whispered to herself.

"Yes, Ms. Granger. I assume you know what it does, I assume right, right?" Snape asked.

The rest of the class nodded.

"Well, as a twist, I will group you in pairs. This is by random chance," as he checked his class record. "Finigan, Zabini. Potter, Lovegood. Weasley, Longbottom. Lavender, Patil.. not you, the other one.." and it went on and on, Snape looking up and down, saying pairs, until he said, "And last but not the least, Granger, Malfoy."

There was yet again another silence.

Draco could feel every eye on them as they Hermione walked towards his table, seeing as he hasn't the slightest intention of moving.

"Malfoy," acknowledging the presence of her partner.

"Granger," Draco said in response.

"As you can see, the ingredients you need are around you. I trust that you know what to do as mature seventh years, that means no explosions," a slight look at Seamus' direction and the latter put his head down. "I will leave the room for a moment, and I expect everyone will be done as I return. Is that understood?"

"Yes professor," the class answered in chorus, and started doing their assigned potion for that day.

"So a little bit of this, a little bit of that," Hermione babbled as she set to work. Leaving Draco baffled at her carefree like attitude, as if he wasn't there.

"Ahem," coughing a bit to catch Granger's attention.

She spun around, surprised. "Oh Malfoy, you're there! I thought you wouldn't want to be part of this and oh will you look at the time Prof. Snape will be coming any minute now so I –"

"Will you quit babbling, Granger? What in Merlin's name are you up to?"

"What are you saying? I'm just doing the Amorentia potion –"

"You're.. you're not acting Granger like! It's.. scary," he cringed while looking at the witch in front of him.

She stayed still for a moment. "I.. Malfoy, uh, can I ask a favor?"

Caught off guard with the sudden change of tone, "Uhm, sure."

"Can you," she started blushing mad, "Forget whatever happened earlier?"

'Let's have a little fun with Granger here,' he thought. "What is it about? I can't seem to remember." He asked nonchalantly.

"The uh.. at breakfast when you.." He was enjoying Granger's discomfort and decided to taunt her a little more.

"Enlighten me," he said and he stepped closer to Hermione.

He could feel her breath, being a few inches away from her. He could see up close her chocolate brown eyes, her petite face framed by her once bushy chestnut colored hair, and those lips.. those bloody small lips. Curiously, he was about to lean down and she wasn't moving, much to his delight when suddenly, he found himself slamming on the ingredients cabinet with a loud _THUD_ and _CRASH_ followed after.

Draco looked up to see the culprit of breaking the moment between him and – not that, he meant breaking his.. dignity and some bones.

"What's your problem Weaselbee?" he directed at the Ron, in a defensive position in front of Hermione who was still taking in the events that transpired in less than a minute.

"What were you about to do to her?" Ron shouted.

"I..," he was stalling, ugh, how he hated that. "I was merely asking her a question about what it is that I did that she wants me to forget." He added a smirk to Hermione.

"What in Merlin's name is he talking about Mione?"

"I.. uh.. well.."

"Come on, Granger, spit it out. Oh! I think I remembered it already.."

He saw Hermione's eyes widen, horror all over her face. But she thought quickly.

"It was nothing, Ronald. Now put your wand down, he won't hurt me, and Malfoy, you better get serious with this potion or else we'll fail."

Draco stood up. Ron still eyeing him.

"Like she said, Weasel, I won't hurt her. Move it. We have a potion to finish."

Ron went back to his seat with his partner but he was still looking at the two who seemed to have an awkward air going around them, and Neville got his attention by spilling the potion, which means they had to redo it all over again. Not his day, really.

Snape went to class just in time for Draco and Hermione to finish their Amorentia potion, who worked in uncomfortable silence. They passed it to Snape and headed back to the dorms. They walked together, keeping a relatively close distance as silence was noticeably washing over them.

They reached the portrait entrance and said the password in unison, to the surprise of both of them. Draco let Hermione enter first, another surprise, and went to their separate rooms, to early to sleep, but the events of today both wore them off, mentally.

Hermione, lying down on her bed, kept thinking about what would have happened if Ron didn't interfere. Would they have..? She shook her head. The thought was absurd. He of all people wouldn't do that to her, a muggle born, as often as he pointed out. But logically thinking, that was what was supposed to happen. And she thought of how annoying it was when Ron hexed him away from her. "Ugh.." she hated that feeling of confusion, and she just closed her eyes trying to forget his mesmerizing blue eyes, his soft looking lips, and his scent that smelled like aftershave yet oddly, she liked it. An innocent smile played on her lips as she fell into slumber.

Draco on the other hand was sitting on his desk, doing his homework's, and trying hard to forget the past events. But what if, he thought, "What if Weasel didn't hex me?" Thoughts and scenarios were playing with his mind. "That does it." He shoved his books and parchment into his bag and got his journal. "I hope it really does help me."

_June 6_

_Granger saw me halfway getting dressed. Her reaction was amusing. Classes were boring as usual, with the exception of Potion's class. We were tasked to make Amorentia, a love potion. Tsk. Granger was my partner. She tried asking me a favor, which she failed to deliver with her face red as cherries. I taunted her a bit to say that I forgot what it is she wanted me to forget. I took a step closer and just for a moment, time stood still. We were facing each other, not a centimeter away from each other. Her eyes, those pink lips, and that intoxicating smell of hers. She smelled like strawberry. Ugh. I was about to lean forward (out of curiosity) when Weasel hexed me and I crashed into the cabinet of ingredients. Stupid half-blood. Stupid Weaselbee. But why am I even bothered by this? Ugh. Might as well sleep and forget the whole thing._

_Draco M._

**A/N: Meh. I hurried this chapter up since I'll be busy next week. But I hope you still liked it. :)**


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